An Awful Sight
by Ellis McDohl
Summary: An excerpt from Lifesaver's journal. His thoughts during the war...


"An Awful Sight"  
by: Ellis McDohl  
First entry: September 1, 2001 (3:20 pm)  
Last entry: September 1, 2001 (11:15 pm)  
Disclaimer: You know who they belong to! To Capcom!  
  
Author's note:  
Hello. Here's an excerpt from Lifesaver's journal. I don't know if he keeps one, though. I've been enjoying myself immensely. I took a rather short break (umm... I fell asleep somewhere that's why it took quite a while...) and started up again. I hope it'll be good. Please tell me what you think of it.   
Other than that, please enjoy.  
  
Ellis McDohl  
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"An Awful Sight"  
by: Ellis McDohl  
  
  
Log in 001 Lifesaver  
Year: 21XX  
Date: September 1  
  
I haven't been in the hunters' long but, I think I have seen enough of that awful sight. I wish I would not see that awful sight. I know I can't, though. Even if I closed my eyes, this sight would not disappear. It never would unless some miracle happens.  
  
That miracle would be the end of this war.  
  
I want to stop the war. But I can't. Even with my healing abilities, I can't.  
The only thing I could do is to cure all the sick and the wounded that come.  
A lot of humans came to take refuge here in the base in hopes that they'll be safe. I tried my best to assure them that they are but even I wonder.  
  
Casualties are rising higher than expected. Everyone here in the sick bay has his or her hands full with them. It's so sad, seeing these patients so helpless and needy. So wounded and broken. So much tears are spilled for their dead and their loss.  
  
An hour ago, I treated a man who had a little girl, waiting outside the emergency room. I did all I could but I couldn't save him. He... died... I didn't know how I would tell that little girl that her father was dead... But she had to know...  
  
And I had the burden of telling her.  
  
When I stepped outside, she looked up at me with her sullen, hazel eyes, while she embraced her teddy bear tightly to her.  
  
I wanted to say something but I couldn't. Nothing came out from my mouth. She smiled at me and shook her head.   
  
"I understand..." That little girl said. "My dad told me... he might go away soon..."  
  
I don't know how she could've known this. I had not said anything. Perhaps she saw it in my eyes. They say that humans can see much, when you look at them in the eyes.  
  
Yet she remained smiling... despite her grief. Her lips trembled as she closed her eyes, trying hard to fight the tears back. Saying she must be strong for her father. She was so young and yet...  
  
...she understood much more of the world. This child...  
  
She couldn't help it. She bent her head down and began to cry, her silent grief. I felt so responsible because I couldn't do anything for her. I was helpless, in the hands of fate as was this girl. The only thing I could do, was hold her close and let her cry on my shoulder.   
  
Her tears flowed down her smooth, pale cheeks, as though it would never stop...  
  
I wish I could stop things like this from happening. But I can't. The only thing I could do is to do my best to prevent it.  
  
I have seen so much death... So much suffering in my line of work... Sometimes, it's inevitable... sometimes it's not... But I...  
  
I am only a machine and I'm not supposed to have these emotions but we are gifted with the ability to think and feel... Is it a gift or a curse? That I can not answer. Many times I've asked myself why was I created this way? Only finding out that it was meant to be this way...  
  
Or is it?   
  
Does it matter?  
  
Maybe it does? I don't know. But when I do, I'll let you know.  
  
And hopefully by that time, I would never look at this awful sight again.  
  
END  
  
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Further note:  
  
Thanks a lot to all the people who read this. I hope this is good.  
I've also noticed that the only thing I've been writing is angst or drama... hmm... I'm not sure what genre is it but I can't seem to write funny things. Looks like it really reflects on my character... I'm not funny at all but I'm not very dramatic either... Looks like I'm talking too much.  
Please excuse me.  
Bye for now.  
  
Ellis McDohl  
  
  



End file.
